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Chapter 1 - Love is in the Air

Here I am after one tiring flight, online and updating my blog. I am stricken by the fact that again on Valentine's day I'm alone. Technically no but since I'm living away from him yes. Never have I really felt Valentine's the way other peeps do. Just an ordinary day. No flowers nor chocolates. Looking back last year, I asked for a 3 days off. I remember coming back from Kuala Lumpur seeing my friend Toni. We agreed on a double-date. I'll fix her up with someone as she'll do the same to me. Ang ending? I stayed home watching all the pirated DVD's I bought. She tried calling me but I already decided to just sleep the occasion off.

Finally now, I got back with my ex-beau last December after almost 2 years of being separated. Funny how things happened. Last October I got the shock of my life when he emailed me... asking how thing's were etc. Cha gave me his mobile and asked if ever I get to fly to Manila, holler him so we can talk. I didn't write back because 2 months back, he txted me the same, replied to him and even called but no... he again ignored me. In my head I was telling myself not to fall for it again. I lived my life in harmony with my new boyfriend Mikey. He was sooo sweet that even if we're not living right next to each other, he sees to it that I'm ok everyday. I even had my bodyclock tuned in Manila. Sleeping at 6pm here waking up at 3am just to chat and see how beautiful and feel how loving this guy is. Mikey's just too good to be true.

When I finally came to Manila last December 26, 2005, I was sooo relieved by the fact that I don't think of Cha anymore and that everything and every places that remind me of him didn't bother me at all. Mikey filled in the emptiness I had.

December 28, 2005

Upon waking up, I got a New Year sms from Cha. We talked on the phone and asked him to meet up. I was thinking perhaps now I'll be able to get the closure I've been longing since we broke up. I went to our secret place... went up the room, knocked, and as soon as he opened the door I just could not contain my emotion. I started crying. Everything came back as in. All the pains were washed away with my tears. Instead of satisfying myself with by hurting him and abusing him verbally, I was was just there awed and still crying as his arms was wrapped tightly to my body. We were trapped by the love that still lives in our hearts. Sadly, both of us are still tied up to our present relationships at that time. We have to face the consequences of our actions and we know along the way someone will be hurt badly. True enough, It was a hell of explanation, bitching... the whole nine yards. whew!

The remaining 10 days of my leave was the happiest and no time was wasted. To date, we're still hanging on and still working up possible solutions to our long distance love affair. I truly hope that in God's time, hopefully sooner, we'll live happily ever after together.

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